The True Meaning of Happiness

aight, lemme tell you how its gonna be...

i'm gonna graduate from cal poly (6 year plan) with a bachelors in e-business, focusing on online entrepeneurship & small business management....however my company is gonna be anything BUT small...my Hotmel Media Corporation is gonna flourish...and i'll buy out other companies such as Yahoo! and AOL....but then i'll sell it for bagazillion dollars.

i'll be on the cover of Time Magazine for being the youngest man to ever hit $500 billion...i'll have my own magazine....my own designer label called "Tajon" (with the french sounding "J")...i'll have my own restaurant chain...and i'll own the lakers...

i'm gonna live the bachelor life to the max...gonna ride around town in a blue jaguar xk8 cabrio...a buncha SUVs too....and of course, an old school 1982 mitsubishi galant...a burgundy one...just like the one i had in saudi...of course, it'll have a kick ass system & a super-charged engine (i'm not a huge fan of racing...but what the hell who cares?), be voice activated featuring the soothing voice of jenna jameson...and of course, it'll have gps/navigation...along with a one of a kind autopilot feature that was specially designed for me by IBM.

i'll also get me a platinum presidents rolex with diamond hour markers...bling bling mother trucker...

eventually, i'll want to settle down and find me a wife...and her name will be rachel stevens. she will be the greatest thing to happen to me...and boy, she's gonna be a monster in bed. hehehe. sure, she's a little high-maintenance...after all, she's been ranked as the #2 hottest woman in the world two years in a row...but hey, i'll be some god damn rich, it won't matter anyways, naaaa'aaameeeee?

the wedding will be beautiful...and it'll be HUGE...everyone that i've ever known in my life will be there....that's right...everyone. if you knew me from school and you said "hi" to me once, you're goin. it'll be a massively huge ceremony...out in an amazing church (still not sure where, but it'll be a big church)...with all of my friends there...and all gazillion aunties and uncles that i didn't even know existed...the room will be completely filled with love....

my house...man...my house is gonna be tight. i personally don't like super big mansions...i just want it to feel like home. i'm gonna live out in the desert with all my homeboys from saudi...model the entire place after my hometown with the commissary and dininghall and security gates and everything. my house will be just like the one from back home...its just one story, 3 bedrooms and a big ol backyard...but man, its gonna be stocked with all this cool shit. every room will have a fatty plasma tv...the backyard will have a swimming pool with a waterbasketball hoop...a fully customized basketball court in my backyard with the Lakers logo in the middle...and of course, a ketchup pump at the dinner table, specially made and refilled daily with libby's ketchup.

i'll get my parents their own house too...hell...it'll be huge....10x bigger than my current house in vegas...they don't like big houses because its a bitch to maintain...but i'll have hired so many people to take care of 'em it won't matter...i'm gonna spoil my parents 30x more than they've ever spoiled me...hell, i'll give my dad my credit card with no max on it...just as a payback because that's what he did for me...

i'll hire my old houseboy, darmi, to be my butler. he'll live in the house that connects to mine (aka erol's house)...it'll be just as cool as mine cuz its what he's always wanted for himself and his family....

i'll hire my own personal chef...hell...i'll hire my own TEAM of chefs...they'll know how to make EVERYTHING...including dad's sweet n sour chicken...papa johns jalepeno pizzas (don't forget that righteous garlic sauce)...hano's california rolls...spicy chicken bowls from yoshinoya...these guys will be the greatest cooking team ever assembled.

eventually i'll have kids. i'll have a boy & a girl...in that order. i'm not sure what i'll name the boy but the girl will either be named "leanna" or "marion." leanna is just a pretty name and marion is a tribute to my mother, marynin. my daughter, she'll be gorgeous...but my son, who will be a basketball/football/track/wrestling star (just like his father) will be her protector. i'll make all these strict rules but i know they'll be breaking all of 'em and be sneaking out of the house...its all good though. the kids they hang out with will be the children of all of my closest friends.

just for goodtime's sake, just like how nico explained it, we'll have security guards on the camp...fat, arabic ones that like to eat kabsa and smoke up....they'll drive around in the good ol red & white ford f150's and hassle the kids to keep 'em in check. they'll basically be too fat and slow to do anything else other than say "yes boss, yes hallo, yes stop, you have ID."

oh man, and the shwarma guy...i can't forget the sweaty turkish shwarma guy. the exact guy that worked at that one corner store...he'll be shipped over here to the states and will legaly have his name changed to "erol the shwarma guy." he'll have his own little cart, kinda like an icecream cart...except for shwarmas...and he'll drive all over town handing out freshly made shwarmas.

aight, so maybe i'm dreamin' a little too much here...but you know what? i'm just gonna live my life day by day, work hard, keep lookin forward and try to be a good person. who knows? maybe karma will be good to me later in life...win the lottery or something. but the main thing is, if years down the road i have a steady job, a loving family...and STILL be in touch with my friends after all these years...well...that's all i could ever ask for...

i'd be the happiest man alive.