Unknown:

throughout my life, i have seen numerous guy friends get whooped. whooped by some girl who isn't going to mean much to him in the long run. but during that short period of time when the relationship is rolling, the guy tends to forget about his other responsibilities. this is where i come in to set everything straight.

bros before hoes. that's the one and only rule. well, don't cheat on the gal...i guess that's another rule. but anyways, i'm not saying that all girls are hoes or anything, so ladies, don't get offended. it's just a generalized term used to describe all the women out there who mess with a guy and take him away from his friends.

a lot of times, it's necessary to take a step back and look at the big picture. if all your life you grew up with a group of guys, then you must place them higher than any short term girlfriend. it makes sense b/c the longer you know someone, the more you should trust them and the more they should mean to you. the problem with guys is that we always think with our hormones and not our heads, so when you meet this girl, you are willing to drop everything for her b/c you think she is perfect. (which goes back to my other point in the other plan that guys tend to think they know the girl well when they really don't). so they drop everything for this girl and he loses all contact with his other friends...but after the relationship ends, he finds himself with no friends to turn to, since he betrayed them all. hahaha. who you gonna turn to now, boy??? IDIOT!

but there is also a lot of misconception as to when or how a guy disses his boy by choosing the girl over his boys. scenario: you promise the girl you'd have lunch with her and then later the guys ask if you want to join THEM for lunch. you say no b/c you're supposed to eat with your girl. are you a diss? NO, you're just trying to be a man of your word. guys who consider that to be a diss are a bunch of morons. but if the girl messes with your previously arranged plans with your guy friends, then there's a prob. or when all you ever talk about with your guy friends is your girlfriend, then there is also another prob. or when the guy is willing to do much bigger favors for the girl than for his boys, then there is a HUGE problem. i know guys who'd drive the girl practically anywhere but would have a fit if you asked him for a ride home. bitter? nah...it just makes decisions about how much you wanna invest in the friendship a lot more easier. actually, to be honest, i haven't been dissed a lot by guy friends...but that's only b/c my friends and i are all losers who can't get any girls anyways. But you can still be a diss even if you never have a girl...lots of guys drop their friends in PURSUIT of a girl...and they end up empty handed. haha.

the true character of a guy is revealed by how he treats his guy friends. anyone can be sweet to a girl that he likes, but it takes a lot more character to be generous and understanding to another guy. why? because close guy friends have nothing to offer unless you're a flaming homosexual with overpowering strength (tom kim) and also b/c since the guys are so close, you can observe how he acts around those who he feels comfortable around. so if he treats his close friends like crap, then be ready to expect the same from him later down the line when he feels comfortable around you. that's why i hate guys who are nice to girls and only girls. girls justify it by saying "well, you just gotta get to KNOW him and his sensitive side...he's just misunderstood..." i say that it's a bunch of BS. a jerk is a jerk is a jerk. they just show no character or class.

girls tend not to ever realize that they are taking their "man" away from his guy friends. so girls, try to be more aware of everything. understand that a guy needs his guy friends, just as a girl needs her girl friends. be understanding if he needs to sacrifice time with you to be with the friends he grew up with. a hoe ain't gonna understand and will demand that the guy give her all of his attention 24/7. a real woman is secure enough in the relationship to loosen that leash a little so that he can live a halfway normal life.

guys, don't lose sight of what's important. don't put all your eggs in one basket, cuz if it falls, then not only do you lose all your eggs, but you feel like a loser for dropping the basket, too. but if you want the girl to understand your need to be with your boys, then make sure you can make her secure in the relationship, otherwise you aren't doing your job as a man. don't be with the guys and neglect the girl, either. but all in all, girls come and go, but friends...well, friends come and go, too. but it just looks better to drop a hoe than to drop your friends. remember, she may be sweet, she may be wonderful, but if she tries to take you away from what made you YOU, then she ain't nuthin' but a HOE. =)

some guys seem to forget...

Original Post

on the flight to new york i was flipping thru those lame Sky Mall catalogs. normally the products they sell are pretty lame but i found a few pages dedicated to those Inspirational Posters that you see around. there was this one poster in particular that caught my eye:

The Power of Attitude

Our lives are not determined by what happens to us, but how we react to what happens; not by what life brings us, but by the attitude we bring to life. A positive attitude causes a chain reaction of positive thoughts, events and outcomes. It is a catalyst....a spark that creates extraordinary results.

daaamn, that was deep; and its so true.

if you remember my Energy & Emotions deep thought, i talked about how positive and negative emotions are just like energy -- than can not be created nor destroyed, only converted from one form or another. if you think about it, your attitude is what determines whether outside forces are converted to positive or negative emotions.

i'm sure you can think of a few people that are pessimists. you can mention just one word to them and they could go on for hours just bitching about it.

i remember in highschool i was talking to this one girl...

Girl #2: hey, i like your shirt!!
Girl #1: thanks!!
Girl #1: (bitch...)

instead of being happy for the compliment, the girl i was talking to started bitching.

Girl #1: she's jealous of me.
Girl #1:she's supposed to say 'you look great in that shirt.'
Girl #1:the way she said it, it implies that the shirt looks good but i don't.

you see what i mean? clearly, Girl #2 was just giving a compliment but Girl #1 managed to twist the whole situation and turn it into negative feelings. crazy, eh? that's the way pessimistic people work -- everything that happens becomes personal in a negative way.

okay, so that's the pessimistic side; that's one end of the spectrum of attitude. but lets not forget that there are two sides of every spectrum. if there's someone that can always find something to bitch about, then at the opposite end of the spectrum there has to be the person that can always find the light in any situation. this person is the optimist. (duh)

you see, the optimist understands that life will have its ups and downs. the optimist understands failure and learning from mistakes. the optimist understands imperfection.

so why is it that we find so many pessimists in our lives and not enough optimists? why is it that we can easily scroll down our buddylists and find at least one person saying something negative in their profile or away message?

all it takes is changing the way we think. and when we do that, life becomes a whole lot more pleasant.

having said that, i'd like to leave you with one last quote (which is a personl favorite of mine):

Stress is not caused by others; its caused by our reaction to others.

really pissed off right now, and i can't sleep without venting somehow. so instead of rolling around in bed for the next few hours, i'm gonna do something constructive and share a deep thought with you all.

First Law of Thermodynamics

Energy can niether be created nor destroyed. It can only be converted from one form to another.

yeah yeah, we've all heard this from highschool physics or chem or whatever; electricity, heat, radiation, blah blah blah.

but what about emotions??

i don't know about you guys but in all of my life experiences, emotional energy doesn't just disapate into thin air. it stays with you, unless you use the energy to do something.

like when people get mad (negative energy). some people go to the gym to relieve the stress. some write music. some break things. some eat a lot. some go out and have rough sex (

). personally, i either take it to the basketball court, talk/bitch to someone about it or vent it out in my blog (much like right now).

Second Law of Thermodynamics

In all energy exchanges, if no energy enters or leaves the system, the potential energy of the state will always be less than that of the initial state.

this is the cool thing about emotional energy. when you do something to vent out your stress, some of the negativity will be lost in the process. (ok, technically "lost" isn't the best word to describe this, but its late and i can't think of the right word

)

if you don't learn to channel that energy, it'll just keep building up inside of ya. that's definitely not cool with negative energy because slowly the irritations become anger, then anger turns to rage, then rage turns to something like Columbine.

here's what i'm trying to get at: the next time your significant other or close friend has something to bitch about, listen to them. its just their way of releasing bad energy. hopefully they'll be bitching about something to you and not bitching at you.

there's a big difference.

the first one is constructive. when the energy is transferred from the person bitching to you (the listener), you then convert that energy into positive energy just by simply being supportive of them.

the latter is just a way of dumping all their shit onto you. negative energy is directed straight at you. the venter will feel better (ie like a big weight has been lifted of their shoulders) but you'll be left with anger, depression or whatever.

basically the next time you get pissed off, use the energy to do something (hopefully constructive, not destructive) cuz at the end of it, you'll feel a lot better.

as for me, all my negative energy is spent cuz i wrote out this little shpiel. i feel a lot better now. thank you, goodnight.

Update

Habibtisbd: near my door i have these words " keep a clam steady flow of positive energy, negative energy is created by the human mind,
Habibtisbd: worry is negative energy, give positive energy to receive positive energy, react to negative energy with positive energy, the difference between us all is how we choose to handle the siutations we are given"

They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis." It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you're doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

// ganked from some random guy's xanger